Have you had a personal D-Day? As far back as 20 years ago, D-Day in a romantic relationship referred to a traumatic discovery or disclosure of porn use.
Jaco chooses not dwell on his D-Day, but instead he focuses on his miracle – a second chance in his marriage. Today he encourages other young men to fight porn with an accountability app and a supportive community. But Jaco’s story starts with an unfortunately common theme: early childhood exposure to pornography.
Exposed to porn at a young age
What I need to say right off the bat is that I was exposed to porn at a very young age.
Back then and even later on porn was considered as something that boys just do – just a typical “guy thing” – a phase that will just pass.
I never knew the absolute grip this thing would have on me and the devastating results that would come from it. The knock-on effect porn had in my life was far reaching, but I only realized the true grasp this thing had on me at a stage in life when I was already married.
My D-Day ~ and how an accountability app helped save my marriage
To cut a very long and shameful story short, God intervened. Because of a specific event, all was exposed (D-Day) and my life fell apart. My wife was broken and the damage was done
Then by a miracle, my wife and I decided to try again. Out of pure desperation I managed to come across Ever Accountable, and this accountability app was a saving grace.
Since I installed it approximately a year ago1 on every device that I could get my hands on, even my daughter’s devices, the actual temptation to search or watch porn has almost diminished.
Accountability apps put a boundary around "porn in your pocket"
The fact that I just could not get ahold of porn and the boundary that this app gives, helped me more than I can put into words.
“Porn in your pocket” is the same as an open bottle of liquor in the hands of an alcoholic — or ever available drugs to a drug addict.
The ONLY WAY to stop is to create time and distance from the source of the addiction, and that is exactly what this app does.
How accountability reports helped rebuild trust in my marriage
The very first report my wife received was an anxious one for her, but when she received a clean report, it made such an impact that she could not hold back the tears.
THAT very moment, when I saw the result of me not watching porn, was the turning point.
Since then I have had clean reports every week and the suspense of “When will he watch porn again?” has stopped. There is a new freedom in our relationship now.
The fact that I do not have to hide my phone or clear the browsing history on every device all the time really gives peace and builds trust in our relationship.
Jaco’s top porn recovery tips
Battle porn with a porn recovery group.
The porn battle is tough, but it gets easier. Get yourself in a group as I have. Share the temptations and pray together.
Battle porn with an accountability app.
Everyone in our group had this porn addiction and everyone installed this app and by the grace of God, we are all porn free.
Two years 1 later: update from Jaco, dedicated porn-fighter
“Ever Accountable is the GO-TO tool that I have shared with a number of my friends, married and single. It has made such a difference and in doing so, it also creates opportunities to share my own testimony with them.” – Jaco
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